The Original "Holy Shit, he really is a necromancer!" By Bill Bradley

Holy Shit! He really IS a necromancer!
By Bill Bradley

“Doo Doo der” Hummed the bus driver, oblivious of Jim and A.H.’s plot to kill him.
“You go in first Jim, then I’ll stab the driver.” It is a very thin plan.
“Okay A.H. I’ll shoot everyone else after you kill him.”
“Agreed.” A.H. spoke as they walked to the bus stop, coming from a nice lay.
“Hmmm…I think I am going to go rape a hooker or something. Maybe a cow.” Thought the bus driver as he neared the bus stop.
“Hey A.H., the bus is coming.” Jim said.
“Okay Jim, get ready.” A.H. said as he stood up from the now flaming bench.
The bus steadily slowed to a stop and Jim ran onto the bus. “Hey, hey, hey, bus riders!” He yelled. A.H. stepped onto the bus with his sword chucks swinging.
“Hey, you can’t have swords on a chain in here Mr. Fire Guy! Those are a fire hazard!” The bus driver yelled.
“They are sword chucks damn it!” A.H. yelled as he stabbed the bus driver. “Nooo! It tickles! Hehe! I mean oh the pain, oh the agony. Blaaaaarg! I am dead!” “Now that he’s dead, eat lead suckers!!!” Jim yelled as he pulled two SMG’s out and started to shoot everyone.
Anyway….
After drinking a lot of booze, Billy Bob the ‘newly’ happy necromancer swaggered towards the bus. As he approached the door Jim and A.H. came out covered in blood. Well, Jim was but A.H. was just on fire. He always is. “Well hey! Hic.. did you kill all those people?”
“Yeah Billy Bob, why?” A.H. asked.
“So I can do this! Hic!’ With some words uttered, Billy Bob raised the bus full of people into the living dead. “I command you! Take over Maxi-Foods! Spare no spic! Hic.”
“Wow Billy Bob, you really ARE a necromancer!” A.H. yelled.
“You don’t call me Billy Bob the happy necromancer for nothing. Hic.”
“Alright guys! Let’s go to sleep!” A.H. yelled.
“Where A.H., where?” Jim asked.
“I don’t know! Let’s go sleep at Strangers house!” A.H. yelled.
“Hic!” Billy Bob uh…hicced…yeah…hicced.
“Okay!” Jim said. And so they ventured on, to a house near you. Well... maybe.